Whether it's fundamentals or simply investors looking for a place to hide, healthcare stocks have had a nice run lately.  Some of the larger healthcare ETFs (and Fidelity's Healthcare sector funds) are listed below -

IShares US Healthcare (IYH)
IShares Biotech (IBB)
SPDR Healthcare (XLV)
SPDR Biotech (XBI)
Fidelity Biotech (FBIOX)
Fidelity Healthcare (FSPHX)
Fidelity Medical Delivery (FSHCX)
Fidelity Medical Equipment and Systems (FSMEX)
Fidelity Pharma (FPHAX)

Both the XBI and IBB have posted gains of 10%+, while XLV and IYH are slightly positive over the past three months.  This compares to the S&P 500 which is down about 10%.

The Fidelity sector funds have a similar three month performance with the Biotech fund leading with a gain of over 10%.

The (Simplified) Cost-Benefit Analysis of Cheating

Assumptions:

1) Each benefit has a value of 1, each cost has a value of 1

Benefits:  

1) One-time sexual gratification

Costs:  

1) Loss of a lifetime of companionship

2) Loss of a lifetime of sexual gratification

3) Betrayal of trust

4) Loss of self-esteem

Conclusion:

Total benefits (1) < Total costs (4)

The total costs of cheating are greater than the total benefits of cheating, and as a result, a rational person should not cheat.  And, being the rational consumer/economist that I am, it would be illogical/irrational for me to cheat; therefore, I will NOT cheat.

It really IS that simple!

Fidelity Dividend Growth (FDGRX) - $2.9B or 20% outflows

Fidelity Growth and Income (FGRIX) - $2.8B or 14% outflows

Fidelity Low Priced Stock (FLPSX) - $2.7B or 8% outflows

Fidelity Advisor Diversified Int'l (FDVAX) - $2.3B or 15% outflows

Outflows are usually not a good thing as they force fund managers to sell positions they might not have otherwise sold.

Of the funds above, only the Low Priced Stock fund is closed to new investors.

We have sell and strong sell ratings on FDGRX and FGRIX, respectively.  We have a buy on FLPSX, which has been an excellent fund in the past.

She's stating Mr. Baseball had an affair. With Madonna. Not of a sexual nature. But an "affair of the heart". Yes, that's right. He cheated on her without "cheating" on her.

I don't think she's wrong for categorizing it as such, though. Now, if she's falsely accusing him then that's a different story altogether but if he is trying to get with Madonna and he's a married man, then hell yes, he's cheated. Point, blank, period.

People are telling me, "Oh but he didn't put his ball in her glove" .... oh, bloody hell. FOHWTS. You don't have to steal third base (or home plate?) to be a cheater, but here is the problem. EVERYONE'S definition of cheating is different. Some people don't consider flirting cheating. Some people don't think kissing is cheating. Some people don't think having an ON-LINE AFFAIR is cheating. My definition is: "Anything you cannot do in the presence of your significant other is betrayal and cheating."If you can't flirt in front of your partner - you're cheating. If you can't kiss the opposite sex in front of your partner - you're cheating. If you can't/won't/don't let your partner see explicit convos, emails or notes that you've sent to a member of the opposite sex - you're a cheater. Makes sense to me. I'd love to hear other people's definitions, especially if they greatly differ.

Of course you then get into the whole notion of what's flirting vs. what isn't and I suppose that's where communication in your relationship comes in. You need to speak up and discuss these things before you get your heart too involved in someone else. A lot of dramas and arguments can be avoided this way. It's basically the easiest way to not having problems. Communication in a relationship is key. At least in my opinion.

Today I asked "him", "if I was to sleep with another woman, would that be considered cheating?" For the record, I'm not gay (I'm with him) or bi-sexual (though, I find women and their bodies incredibly sexy) but I just wanted to see what his answer would be. He replied: "It'd be cheating no more than if i was to sleep with another man *barf*".(lol) I got my answer loud and clear. I teased him and said: "Got it. So long as you aren't there or involved, sleeping with a woman is cheating."

Believe it or not, I've had some people disagree. They say a roll in the hay with a member of the same sex isn't cheating. Can you believe that one!? Apparently, because there is no penile to vagile penetration, it's not cheating. Word? If you give yourself physically, emotionally or spiritually (with the exception of God) to anyone but your spouse you are low down and dirty. A snake, even. Don't kid yourself.

Being faithful is really hard for some people. I don't understand the need to be unfaithful. Especially if you say you love who you're with. I'd have more respect for someone if they told me they had lost interest and broke up with me before they cheated. I then have the CHANCE to try and make it right or better somehow. If I can't salvage it, then sure, I'm hurt but at least I'm not played, you feel me?
This whole idea of "there is no pussy/dick like new pussy/dick" is nothing more than a sad and sorry excuse. If you are putting it down PROPER on your partner ... then no amount of new dick or pussy is going to make them stray. This is why I say, ladies, don't be a hoe in the streets but be your MAN'S hoe. Keep him satisfied. Release your inner freak. If he cheats, don't let it be because you have a 'lax pussy. Gentleman .... the same goes for you. (But exchange the word pussy for dick, of course. Ha!)

Cheating this day in age is just much too dangerous. There are too many diseases and infections blowing around in the wind. I'm quite paranoid about them and refuse to put myself in that position. Then of course is the problem of an unwanted pregnancy. You just have to be RESPONSIBLE. If you don't want a relationship, don't be in one. Simple, right? Yea, I think so, too. No one forces you to settle down. Just have respect - that is all. Respect for someone else ... besides yourself.

I learned this in kindergarten: "Treat others the way you would like to be treated."Some people need to go back to kindergarten to re-learn some things.

Man, all you need to do is TALK about what cheating is to you. Talk about what the different levels are, if applicable. Avoid the problems and say no to temptation. That hottie with the phat ass .. or that cutie with the solid pecs ...... they could be burnin'. Know this. Don't bring that crap home to the person you say you love.

Otherwise, I can be your first grade school teacher all over again.

71.      She seeks to be friends with her kids and elevates them to adult status. This demotes husband to subordinate status, which he views as insignificance and, therefore, insufferable.

72.      A woman has to sell a man on fidelity, marriage, and her female worth as comfort partner. Otherwise, men focus on frequent and convenient sex as comfort from their daily ‘battles’.

73.      She welcomes kids with open arms but not him. She takes his arrival home for granted, because she wants relief with the kids.

74.      Hook up but no call? She lost her footing playing in a man’s territory.

75.      Trying to make a couple’s life fair or equal is self-defeating.  

[Previous fortitudinals appear in posts 255, 250, 245, 240, 234, 228, 213, 203, 199, 186, 182, and 176.

♀ When a hottie becomes haughty, she might as well be a nottie—after conquest, that is.

♀ Expectant mothers duplicate tee-shirted, pot-bellied men, which drives expectant father’s eyeballs to every attractive female within sight.

♀ He cheats on her, so she cheats on him. The former hurts her, the latter terminates their relationship.

♀ Women abandon femininity, modesty, high moral standards, and other female strengths just to have a boyfriend or husband they can’t keep.

♀ It’s self-fulfilling: A wife blames husband for his faults. Accused men resist change and defend themselves by disproving the evidence presented. In her eyes, his resistance makes her see his faults as her failure to correct him. Her failures turn him toward inadequacy. It started with her accepting him with faults she could not stand.

♀ Behind each ex there’s an inadequate man. He’s either dumper or dumpee. Yet, she chose him with inadequate qualifications, and her choices will always determine her outcomes.

♀ Short-term romantic love seduces women into ignoring the need for her man’s respect. Hence, when romantic love fades in a year or two, his respect for her is not enough to fuel his long-term enduring love.

[More about sex and fickle females appears in posts 246, 229, 216, 201, 184, 170, 160, 148, 137, 93, and 34. Scroll down or search by the number followed by a dot and space.]

IT HAS BEGUN! (Implementation that is)

This week I began implementation of the SharePoint after taking feedback all last week from the group members. I got some good constructive criticism and some issues were brought up that I had not thought about. I also spent a good bit of time catching some people up who had been out on vacation for my presentation. The only major structural change was the integration of the retirement and non-retirement tax pages into one tax page. This was because the managers of both teams thought our work overlapped too much to separate.

I spent most of Monday implementing three pretty basic tags so I could better showcase the grouping and filtering capabilities of SharePoint. I went through and tagged all the documents in the library with my new tags. I did all this in data sheet view to allow quick editing. Little did I know if you drag column items that start or end with numbers SharePoint auto-increments them. I ended up having to go back and fix a lot of data after catching this bug.

I wanted to show all the documents for a specific team, sans-folders, on their pages. We have approximately 1600 documents in our library roughly split evenly between the 2 pages. Trying to show all 800 or so documents at once slow the page to a crawl. The pages were taking 10-15 seconds to load, which is just too long. I set the pagination to 250 items and now the pages load in about 3-5 seconds, but I feel like there is a loss of functionality there that I lament. I am trying to convince people to use the filters, but they are slow to adopt.

One of the guys who had been out on vacation asked me about personalizing his page. So today I created a short little how-to document and I sent him the draft. He is suppose to get back to me with his feedback on if it satisfies his needs and how easy it was to follow and duplicate. It was just a basic step-by-step on how to create a personal page and setup a personal document library to filter only what you want to see.

Next week I am going to start getting the statements page up to the same level of functionality as the tax page. I am very unfamiliar with all they do so I am having to work closely with their project manager. Hopefully I'll come away with a better understanding of what they do exactly.

Work on your own.

A wedding band is no simple ring, it's a symbol of love, faithfulness and your undying devotion to your spouse.  This is exactly why I was so thankful to Mandy for recovering my missing band while searching her innerself and reflecting upon the two hours of private dances that took place the night before up in the VIP room.

-Outlaw

Sonstige Auftritte:
-Duluth/Minnesota/USA
-TOTAL WEihnachstfeier, Technikmuseum, Berlin
-SAGE Club,Berlin
-Spindler+Klatt, club,Restaurant,Berlin
-Arena, Berlin
-Liquidrom, Berlin
-Villa Ritz, Potsdam
-MS Esplanade
-Capitol Club im Hilton Hotel, Berlin
-centre francais,Berlin
-Kunstverein Apholda Avantgarde
-Felix-Restaurant im Hotel Adlon
-Hannover:Herrenhauser Gärten (kleines Fest im  grossen Garten)
-Adlon, Berlin
-Siemens Hauptquartier, Berlin
-Logenhaus, Berlin
-Hannover Forst-und Holzinsindustrie-Messe(Expo-Gelände)als Pianistin
-Kadewe (mehrere Auftritte im Advent`01,`02,`03,´04,´06)
-Borchardt-Restaurant
-Kino Filmpalast, Berlin, Kurfürstendamm(´06,´07)
-Wertheim, Kudamm
-Wertheim,Hermannplatz
-Ekz "Das Schloss"
-Solar Club,Berlin
-Baambi Lounge im Cafe Moskau, Berlin
-Gropiuspassagen(´03,´04,´05,`06,´07)
-Cafe Restaurant Einhorn
-Cafe-Restaurant Weltbühne
-Cafe Schönbrunn
-GOLDWELL Academy, Berlin
-Apostel Paulus-Kirche
-Augustinum , Berlin-Kleinmachnow
-Schumm-Stift bei Stuttgart
-Rathaus Pankow
-Kapelle der evangel.Kirchengemeinden Luther in -Berlin Lankwitz
-Museum im Wasserwerk Friedrichshagen, Berlin
-Kirchen-Kapelle, Löwenberg
-Dach vom legendären Club E-Werk, Berlin
-Eröffnung der "Klinik am Rhein", Düsseldorf (auch als Bodypainting Model)
-Chalet Suisse, Berlin
-Electromusik mit HeyGinelli in der Automatenbar, Berlin
-Electromusik mit HeyGinelli bei Musikanwälten am Mehringdamm; Berlin
-Regent Schloss-Hotel,Berlin (2002,2003)
-Regent Hotel am Gendarmenmarkt (´04,´05,`06)
-Buero der Forensischen Prüfung, Berlin (Bob Young Events)
-Casting Day, Potsdam Babelsberg (auch mit hey ginelli)
-Klub Zentral, Berlin (mit hey ginelli)
-"Pomp Duck and Circumstance", Berlin
-PAx, Berlin (für DB und atkon)
-Landgasthof"zum grünen Strand der Spree", Schlepzig
-Restaurant"Zur historischen Mühle", Potsdam (Sylvesterfeier`03)
-Verein Oberlinhaus,Potsdam
-französischer Dom, Gendarmenmarkt, Berlin
-Frisörsalon"Fräulein Schneider",Berlin
-Hochzeitsmesse, Berlin
-Vierseithof, Luckenwalde
-Maria Montessori-Grundschule, Berlin

-------------------------------------------

Vernissagen:
-rohkunstbau,Wasserschloss Gross Leuthen,Spreewald
-Akademie der Künste Ost
-Merck, Finck und Co., Privatbankiers
-Volksbank Potsdamer Platz
-Galerie Glasperlenhaus, Berlin
-Cafe/Club Wohnzimmer
-Galerie am Scheunenviertel
-Villa Donnersmark
-Elektromusik mit heyginelli in der Galerie Stadtblind, Berlin
-Elektromusik mit heyginelli im Kunst Werk(48h Neukölln), Berlin

-------------------------

Harfen-Klangperformance:
-Toscana Therme Bad Sulza
-Theaterfestival Ruhr(mit Feuershow)
-Volksbühne Berlin
-Prater der Volksbühne(auch als Schauspielerin)
-Kunstbiennale im Postfuhramt
-Kammerbar, Deutsches Theater
-Aktionsgalerie
-Pfefferberg
-Caroussel Theater
-Oxymoron
-Neurotitan c/o Schwarzenberg,ev.
-Cafe der Schaubühne(im Rahmen des F.I.N.D.-festivals)
-Tattoo-convention,Columbiahalle
-Hebbeltheater(100°-Festival)
-------------------------

Lesungen:
-Restaurant Modellhut (Lesung mit Britt Kanja)
-Cafe Einstein,Berlin,(Lesung mit Britt Kanja,für MINI Magazine)
-Sophiensääle(Joachim Bessing:Die Wir-Maschine-dva)
-Kammerbar des DT(Eva Corino:Das Taschenbuch-rohwolt)
-Lehrter Kulturfabrik
-Gerberhof, Stendal
-Ausland,Berlin
-Galerie Mori Ogai
-Kirche Liebenberg(Literaturinstitut Leipzig)
-Rendsburg, Klangraum
-Oxymoron, Berlin
-Canitzgesellschaft,Berlin
-ORB mit Ken Jebsen
-im Big Eden(Lauschrausch Akt1)
-Praxis Dr.Wohlt-forum of vocal arts(als Pianistin) mit Hubertus Regout
-Restaurant"Zur historischen Muehle", Potsdam, Sanssouci(Canitzgesellschaft)
-Augusta Heim, Berlin-Zehlendorf
-Cafe Melange,Parchim
-Sonntagsclub, Berlin

Ever since I started reading "I never promised you a rose garden", I have become more and more aware of the connection between Greenberg and myself. Supposedly, in spite of the book being a self-admission to schizophrenia, it's currently believed that she only had depression, with schizophrenia being a trashcan diagnosis. Although I only know her from this one book, I don't believe that she was merely depressed. The book ends with her leaving Yr, to live in the "real world", but I think that was just closure on her part. She never really left, she just compromised. To live in the real world, she learned to accept lies, adapt to things, force Yr into the background, and most importantly, exercise inhibition. Perhaps I'm just "believe[ing] what [I] want to believe" (quote from Matrix), but it seems to me that Joanne still senses the world of Yr, but sets it aside in favor of the semblance of sanity.

To better understand the connection between us, I made use of metaphors to illustrate our independent relationships to "the world":

spiritual vs. physical: spiritual=me; physical=her.

I can't imagine anything for more than a few milliseconds. Although a great amount of concentration can yield the semblance of imagination, I know that in the sessions I have done this, I have produced the equivalent of a 3 fps (frames per second) video clip. On the other hand, I'd say I'm a prodigy when it comes to "imagining audio" (I can't think of the right terminology for it- if someone could please comment filling in the blank- "imagination is to visual as ________________ is to auditory). If I were to re-learn how to read music, I could probably improvise the audio and lyrics of most Linkin Park songs currently released (though I wouldn't- it would be a waste of effort.)

Although this theory still need a lot of fine-tuning, it goes like this: Greenberg had an incredible imagination, which was materialized with Yr. I have no imagination- our difference in this regard is worth noting. the physical-spiritual comparison is, the more I think about it, inappropriate, but it was where these thoughts started out. What I was trying to illustrate with this comparison was that it was "different ways of looking at the same thing" In all truth, the fact that I used "physical" and "spiritual" for this comparison, is because my insights were influenced by Spinozan pantheism. Actually, after looking up the wikipedia article on it, I realized that "physical" should be replaced with "natural", or rather, the comparison should be "spirit vs. nature", in accordance with Spinoza's theory- as well as being more appropriate for my own.

Different ways of looking at the same thing (i.e. the glass is half-empty=pessimism; the glass is half-full=optimism) are pure in form, and are mirrored in reality, many times radically (i.e. crime vs. justice). What I find most interesting is the startling connection between

(a) "nature"--> and evil, witchcraft, idols, human/animal sacrifice, fantasy, etc.

(b) "spirit"--> and good, "white magic", psychics, prophets, etc.

It's important to note a few things: the latter (b) is very compatible with modern morality, and even Christianity itself. Again, it's just different ways at looking the same thing (a dualism within a dualism!)- If we set aside all bias and preconceptions, it's quite easy to see the resemblance. Christians just use words like that to denote that "they didn't do it our way". (just a little IMHO)

This dualism was utilized in the production of Stargate SG-1, in the form of the Alterans, who adopted a more scientific/rational outlook, and the Ori, who fervently pursued religious belief. Both started out with good intentions, but both ended up being controlled by their desires. On one hand, the Alteran civilization was destroyed partially due to their nonchalant nature, as they were completely taken off-guard. Even as ascended beings, they allowed much turmoil to devastate the physical world, and eventually risked their own devastation for the sake of maintaining balance, keeping to the code, and non-interference. The Ori, on the other hand, had what the Alterans lacked- desire, but what they received in power, they paid in integrity, and they lost even the the semblance of satisfaction. Their followers also paid the same price they did, if only at smaller scale.

In addition to serving as a worthy illustration those concepts further discussed below, the Alteran-Ori allegory also illustrates the conflict between science and faith.

I myself have heavy tendencies towards the path of the Alterans- I too have a lack of concern for the state of things, a need to protect balance, and am indeed one who prefers to think and not act. In fact, I am just as satisfied with thinking of doing it as I would be with doing it, so I would have no problem with the suggestion, "let's not and say we did". I have the intention of getting a girlfriend/etc. who is either very occult or very religious- the reason being to (a) balance out my opposite tendencies, and (b) to initiate a "spiritual" connection between "nature" and "spirit", spawning balance, fidelity, and a nexus between the two.

Another point of interest: natural (black) magic puts and emphasis on carnal desire, impulse, immediate gratification, and lust. Partly for this reason, I initially wanted to merge [what was the beginning of] the contents of this post with Id versus Ego:

In other words, [black magic, etc.] exists to please the Id, and [white magic, etc.] exists to please the Ego. As quoted in a 1933 newspaper article, Crowley said "Black magic is not a myth. It is a totally unscientific and emotional form of magic, but it does get results — of an extremely temporary nature.
It is like looking for an escape of gas with a lighted candle. As far as the search goes, there is little fear of failure! To practice black magic you have to violate every principle of science, decency, and intelligence. You must be obsessed with an insane idea of the importance of the petty object of your wretched and selfish desires. I have been accused of being a "black magician." No more foolish statement was ever made about me. I despise the thing to such an extent that I can hardly believe in the existence of people so debased and idiotic as to practice it." The recoil upon those who practice it is terrific." Crowley's thoughts on black magic perfectly illustrate the connection between the Id and "nature", and it also manages to merge with Schopenhauer's chaotic will-to-life world.

Thus, the reason why we find happiness in the Id, and torment in the Ego, is because the Ego mirrors the agony of the soul- or, as Spinoza put it, "spirit". Now it's time to get the primary focus of this post, which, would you believe it (?!) has not even been addressed in the ~1300 words thus far.

That point being, "naturally"(!) that I am "in the world, but not of it"- so, what do I mean by that?

In I never promised you a rose garden, Blau explains how, after discovering Yr, the Censor appears to act in her stead whenever she was drawn into the world of Yr. The Censor's name is self-descriptive- its job is to provide the semblance of sanity, by [my interpretation:] using knowledge of "norms", "habits", and "common sense". Thus, the world never actually knew Deborah Blau, they only knew the Censor. As I wrote in Maria, who I appear to be in person, or any type of direct interaction, is a shallow reflection of who I truly am. All my real memories are in this blog- this blog is my real life. After thinking about the purpose of the Censor, I realized that I too, have a Censor- giving the semblance of sanity- or in more conservative wording, normality. This blog is my Yr.

There are many things that baffled me before that this insight make sense of: Why am I so detached? Why can't I remember my emotions in the past? Why do I lack friends, despite having a great desire to socialize? Essentially everything I do that involves interaction- I don't know why I do it, I just do. It's as if it's not even me that's doing it. I don't know why I do any of the interactions I do, either in conversation or action, until after I do them, and yet I approve of all of them. This can't be a coincidence. Why do I approve all of them? It's because I am not the slave, I am the master. My Censor acts in my name, I only oversee as the Observer. Where my true self lies, and that which is reflected more accurately in this blog, is elsewhere, which for lack of a better word, I dub "the spiritual realm"

So if you ever meet me, talk to me, befriend me, remember that it's not "me" that you know, but a zombie! :p

Update: I just realized another interesting thing: Christianity was (no matter how you look at it) originally a cult of Judaism. Now, Judaism is strikingly similar to black magic (temples, rites, rituals, animal sacrifice, etc.) with some white magic elements (prophesy, "miracles", etc.) So it's relatively likely that Christianity evolved out of a Jewish sect that felt the more "black magic" practiced were "old-fashioned", and should be "phased out" in favor of more "white magic" oriented practices. Modern Christianity has predominantly "white magic" practices, although, presumably due to its heritage, it still retains some "black magic". So if that was the plan, they definitely suceeded! :-)

It has always been my opinion that while style guidelines are good to follow having a consistent style is the most important thing. I agree with many of the guidelines he outlines here but not all of them and I do not follow them all. My style is pretty consistent and has grown out of the basic guidelines and what I feel works best for me.

Here is the document, it is in a draft form so it is a little rough.

dotnet-guidelines

Because he was wise, he also knew that there were serious consequences if any of these time-tested rules were broken or ignored, so he did everything in his power to teach and repeat the rules to prepare and protect his children.

The father emphasized that abiding by these rules was a very critical matter for the whole family, because whenever one child chose to disrespect, mock & ignore these rules, they placed all the others in danger. The father promised his children that if they could respect and honor all the truth he had diligently taught, they would have happiness, peace and protection.

As time went on, a growing child would declare that their way was better, smarter and more popular than Dad's. They proudly justified that they were exceptional and the rule did not apply to them.

This would inevitably inflict dire consequences on themselves, and many others. Sometimes the children would learn from these devastating experiences and return to the wisdom of their father. But too often, they did not.

Now fast forward a few hundred years. The Father, his rules and the dangers have not changed. The current generation faces daily choices which bring them either closer to safety or peril. Sadly, many are choosing to believe this story is all just a nice myth that can easily be ignored. After all, everyone is free to believe and do what they want! Right? However, wise children easily see the truth. Evidence surrounds us every day of the sorrowful consequences innocent family members suffer because our Father's important rules are forgotten and trampled. His warnings and teachings prove just as true today as always.

A story ripped right out of today’s Canadian National Press headlines, entitled Be Faithful, Or Die makes a strong witness. Two of our Father's "top ten" rules, i.e. Maintain Sexual Fidelity and Tell the Truth, are dramatically highlighted in this recent report. This news article is a very global and sobering reminder of the consequences when rules are mocked and go unheeded. Reporter Barbara Kay exposes the hidden agenda’s and lies which plague the fight on AIDS/HIV. I encourage you to read the entire article.

Let me share my thoughts on some highlights:

“Michael Fumento, a public intellectual specializing in health issues, lamented the entrenched truth-avoidance in the AIDS industry”

And what is the truth that so many are side-stepping?

Promoting abstinence and fidelity brings the only successful drop to HIV infection, and lasting change regarding this deadly illness.

The article highlights multiple published research analysis and findings that date clear back to the 1980s. Whenever sexual partners were reduced the AIDS diagnoses dropped directly in proportion. When strict abstinence and fidelity was followed, the incidence virtually disappeared.

But what about condom use, you say? Ah yes. The world's favorite little breakfast champion of sexual promiscuity. The magic ticket to "safe sex" land! Sorry, condoms are neither a solution nor a prevention. In fact, the truth reveals they may have exactly the opposite effect!

“Even though condom use rose throughout the '90s all over Africa, the HIV rate also kept climbing”

It is interesting to note that Uganda, who initially started with the highest AIDS statistics saw the greatest success while others were failing. What did they do differently? They were the only country running a campaign to promote restraint and fidelity!

In light of all the knowledge, statistics, and mountains of documented evidence establishing the true facts regarding this global life-and-death issue, what would you expect to have happen? Certainly all of this information would be shared quickly with the world! However, what do you suppose really happened when the truth was presented to the people with power to make a difference? You guessed it, a proud contingient of our earthly siblings decided the truth wasn't popular or comfortable or convenient enough, so they avoided it, and made their own rules.

"When independent consultants, some of them hired by UNAIDS [The Joint United Nations Program on HIV/AIDS], reported to the agency that partner reduction, not condoms, was largely responsible for Uganda's HIV decline, their reports were ignored or never made public."

Worse, international AIDS "experts" scolded Uganda's National AIDS-Prevention Committee for encouraging sexual restraint, which was believed to be naive and ineffectual. Sadly, as advocacy of fidelity and youthful abstinence was systematically undermined, Uganda's HIV rates began to rise again.”

It would be well over 20 years and millions of deaths later before these lies would begin to surface and truth & consequences acknowledged. (isn't this sounding terribly reminisscent of the American Tobacco industry cover-up?... amazing how evil replicates itself. Are large lawsuits looming on the horizon? Who will we sue, condom manufacturers or UNAIDS? Oh wait...all the clients are dead)

“UNAIDS publicly acknowledged that partner reduction was pivotal to HIV reduction. It took so long because, in the words of a candid insider: "There was a sense that promoting fidelity must be totally wrong if it was a message favoured by the Christian Right. We've made an emotion-based set of decisions and people have suffered terribly because of that."

Wow. I can't even find an appropriate response to equal this last horrifying revelation.

Here is yet another example to the world that any human being who chooses to follow the Father’s rules, even if they are among those "scary" Christian Right, are NOT WRONG! In fact, their efforts may very well be the only thing saving the earth from total annihilation.

The truth is finally out. What happens now?

It doesn't take a rocket scientist to deduce that the eradication of AIDS requires a "simple" and completely free solution. A return to the basic rules the Father gave us governing our sexual power; abstinence before marriage, and complete fidelity afterwards. Of course, I realize that our world is so contaminated right now after years of "sexual grazing", that even if this was followed to the letter from this moment on, the after-effects would remain for some time. There are millions of currently infected victims, a contaminated blood and plasma supply, newly infected - including the unborn, and on it goes. Certainly the illness would inevitably continue to exist for years. However, the benefit to the world of STOPPING the root cause would create an immediate global balm. With a concerted effort, we could probably eradicate the world of this terrible pestilence once and for all within one generation or less! The truth is simple, and it sets us free!

Yes, sadly I know this is only a beautiful dream. Every single child of the human family would need to be fully committed to following the rules. The reality is that they never have before, so it is unlikely we will fully eradicate AIDS/HIV (or any other of the myriad social ills) from our midst because there are always earthly siblings who don't really care about themselves, their family, nor the consequences of their actions.

However, this should not discourage us from vastly improving our world immediately! Now that the TRUTH is out, (or hopefully it will soon be OUT-ed by honest journalists and bloggers everywhere), we should demand policies and programs put immediately into place to educate the masses.

Will there be new TRUTH ad campaigns promoting abstinence (instead of condoms)? I hope so! Look what we have been able to accomplish with the TRUTH about smoking ads, and the "Just Say No" campaign against drugs! A little truth goes a long way.

And what will Hollywood do now? All of those eager-beaver "champions of AIDS" continually crying for the cure, and donating vast sums of other people's money. Well, now the truth is out. The power to create the cure lies within each one of us, including them. So, will these icons of the silver screen actually practice what they preach? I would like to see them prove just how much they want to fight AIDS/HIV. Why not have them each reduce their own sexual partner body count? That would make a significant change to the world right there. Or, will they choose to stick to their "truth avoidance" campaign?

One holds out hope Hollywood will begin a new campaign promoting the TRUTH. They will create beautiful movies with family values, starring youthful characters who choose chastity before marriage, remind their friends that being a virgin is the cool new thang, and that nothing is sexier than a faithful marriage!

Will sexual addicts and predators be portrayed as the true criminals they are? Or will Hollywood continue to glamorize them? Is our global death threat real enough now that the public will finally demand a code of decency?

We each have the opportunity to take a stand. We each have the power to make a difference, and the responsibility to teach the rising generation. A popular children's song states simply:

“Keep the Commandments,

In this there is Safety, In This There Is Peace!”

Our Father has never stopped pleading with his beloved children to trust in His wisdom, keep His important rules, and stay safe. As much as a parent would like, we cannot force our child to do the right thing. We all must choose for ourselves. It's our turn to take a mighty stand. Hopefully, we realize that avoiding the truth is deadly.

How are you doing with the "30-Day Encouragement Challenge"? In case you've
forgotten, here's the challenge:

• You can't say anything negative about your husband ...to your husband...or to anyone else, about your husband.
• Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband...to your husband...and to someone else, about your husband! 

"...but who can find a faithful man?" Prov. 20:6b

Faithfulness is a wonderful but rare quality today, especially in regard to marriage. Do you understand how important this quality is? Your challenge is to continue to root out all negative speaking, and plant seeds of encouragement instead. You may be amazed at what will grow.

Contemporary culture often entices men to be unfaithful to their wedding vows and spiritual commitments. Appreciate your husband's faithfulness - how he is loyal to you.

Let him know that you are glad he has "stick-to-it-iveness" in your marriage. Appreciate his faithfulness to God. (If you have an unfaithful husband, this is a difficult area for you. Pray, speak the truth in love, remain faithful yourself, and discover ways to encourage faithfulness in your mate. The Bible says that husbands may "...be won by the conduct of their wives" [1 Pet. 3:1]. You may also want to seek counsel from a mature, godly individual or couple.)

I think that if we learn to be a little less selfish sometimes and think of others - the other person's feelings, the children who will be hurt - we might then be able to exercise some self control.

I once read the question a mother asked her daughter in a novel... she asked "are you going to throw away a marriage for an affair", this was when she found out that her husband was having an affair. It was hard for me to stomach although we view cheating husbands in Nigeria a little differently from how they are seen in other countries. One of my friends once told me that as long as there was neither a reduction in the money, time nor affection which she received from her husband, she didn't care what he did! Well! I totally hate the thought of divorce but that...!

About divorce, I don't think any woman or man for that matter goes into a marriage with divorce on their minds, it's just that sometimes, we give up easily. I am aware that in many cases it cannot be helped...my dad would be scandalized to read this, but I would personally take up the case of a woman who is being abused by her husband, in fact I would gladly represent her in court!

I recently participated in a discussion on Facebook; it was what your reaction would be if you came home early and found your husband of 5 weeks in bed with another woman. Ahhh... imagine how interesting that was. What would you do? Where does forgiveness come in?

That being said, I thank God for a man who does not cheat. Yes, I know what a lot of folks are thinking, we aint married yet. But I believe he has never cheated on me in the one year plus that we've been dating and it has not been easy because he's one fine looking man. I'll keep praying for him; the temptation would always be there but when all is said and done, it is God that helps a man stay faithful.

Fidelity recently launched a new international fund.  Like the name implies, the Fidelity Emerging Europe, Middle East, Africa (EMEA) fund focuses on countries in the Middle East, Africa and European region (mainly in Eastern Europe).  The new fund will trade under the ticker symbol FEMEX. 

Similar to many emerging markets, the countries covered by this fund have been some of the best performing worldwide markets in the past couple of years.  Strong demand for natural resources including oil and gold have propelled countries like Russia, South Africa and most of the Middle East countries. 

The fund will be managed by Adam Kutas who has 12 years of experience with Fidelity.  He previously managed the Fidelity Latin America fund (FLATX).   The fund will have a minimum investment of $2500 which is standard for most Fidelity funds.

Some of the countries that the fund invests in are considered "frontier markets".  Back on June 22, we wrote a post about Claymore's new frontier ETF (FRN).  This fund may be a good alternative for anyone looking to gain exposure to frontier markets, but prefers Fidelity mutual funds versus ETFs.  The same risks apply to this fund as we highlighted in the FRN post.

Our Company:

Fidelity Investments is an international provider of financial services and investment resources that help individuals and institutions meet their financial objectives.

We must say that we have a rich and proud history. From our roots as a small mutual fund company, Fidelity has grown to become a leading provider of a wide range of services, including investment management, retirement planning, brokerage, and human resources and benefits outsourcing services.

What hasn't changed over the years is our commitment to continuous improvement, state-of-the-art technology and peerless customer service. Fidelity is responsible for many innovations that are standards in the industry today. We reinvest a substantial portion of our revenues each year back into technology to deliver new products and services to investors. And we are consistently recognized by industry surveys and publications for providing some of the highest levels of customer support.

A job at Fidelity can open up a world of career possibilities. Fidelity offers employees the opportunity to build careers, to develop professionally, and to explore endless opportunities and career paths through the company. We encourage you to go ahead and take a look at what positions we currently have available, at our Careers Site below, and hopefully there will be a job that's perfect for you!

***Fidelity's Careers Site***

First, I was going to go to Starkville next weekend to see some of my bffs from MSU and LHS. I knew I couldn't go now, but didn't know how I was going to break it to the people who expected me to come. Only two people were in my heart and mind as I prepared my excuses and one of them, Mark, called me this weekend to apologize profusely that he just could not make the drive from Austin. Perfect, one down. Now, for Marie.

I could have said that I couldn't afford the gas, or that Wet and Wild was going on at the Zoo this weekend and I really wanted to go. I could have insisted that I was expected to teach Religious Ed this Sunday at church. All of these things are true. But that's not why I can't go.

I can't go because I feel like I can't possibly ask my husband to trust me enough to let me go down there alone and drink next weekend. Not right now. And I would love to hide this part of my personal life, but after ranting and wailing about Jeremy's transgressions on myspace, how can I omit my own and thus lie to you all and give you a skewed vision of my marriage, of my life?

I cheated on my husband this summer. Not physically, but mentally, emotionally, verbally. It is really hard to admit that to you because I don't consider myself that kind of person. Most of you know via my myspace blogs what all happened back in April, and how I was just at a very vulnerable point in my marriage. Had I not had children, I would have left him then. But instead I started to go out more often, drink more. When an old high school friend emailed me, a safe opportunity presented itself. After all, this guy lives nearly a world away, so it's not like the guys at the bar, it's not really real, right? It's harmless, it's fun, it's not serious and it's not cheating. But that's bullshit, it's not harmless, it's hurtful... I would be so hurt if it had been done to me.

After all that's gone on, Jeremy and I were finally able to talk. We talked a lot about the vicious cycle we've been in - one of us hurts the other, we feel justified in hurting each other back, and round and round we go... We have now decided to forgive and move forward and see if we can possibly get on with our lives and stop hurting each other just for some sort of revenge that does nothing but backfire.

We went to Louisville this weekend. We dropped the kids off at my parents and rode around the town, seeing if anything had changed since our last visit (it's been a loooong time). Not much has. We got to see an old friend that night, Todd, who Jeremy and I agree is our coolest mutual friend. Todd and I didn't become friends until EC, but we went to high school together. While we were out (at Old Venice, missing YOU, Marie) we discussed high school, the people we knew, and the Where They Are Now stories.

I have a confession. I've been jealous of people like Marie, who have friends they've known since childhood, who keep up with people they graduated with, who enjoy going home. And I've thought that I am a misfit in my old school, with my old friends; that I am an outcast in my own hometown and that I am unloved and unwanted. I've had visions of my empty funeral, of childhood friends who say, "Good riddance."

But sitting outside the bar that night, Todd says to the group, "the only person from Louisville High School that I care about seeing is sitting right there," and pointed to me.

And I thought about that. It was a pretty big compliment considering he's hands down my favorite person I graduated with, but that's not what I pondered on - not only is he on my very short list of People From Louisville I Care Anything About, but I also thought about who else might have Todd on their list. Probably not many people in Louisville give a shit more about him than they do about me. But I think he's one of the coolest human beings on the planet. So does it lessen who he is as a person, that Louisville doesn't care about him? FUCK NO. So why do I hold myself to a different standard?

I promised him I'd text him as soon as we made it home safely, and nearly 60 hours later I remembered to do that. The ride home from Starkville took a little longer that night, though, because Jeremy and I detoured through the Refuge and made love on the Overlook for hours while a storm rolled in. The thunder, the lightning, the wind and being naked in raw nature... it was the most perfect night of my life so far. And I knew after that that we were going to make it.

On the way back to my parents' I told him to stop the car. See, there is another person on my List of Louisvillians, but he died a couple years ago. I've never stopped missing him, and I've never been open and honest about our relationship. I kinda hid it from most of my friends, afraid they would think I was weird or that telling them about this man would cheapen what we had together.

Since childhood, I have walked across my street to visit an old gentleman across the road. His name was George, and he'd fix me something to drink and let me look at his pictures while he talked. I'd especially admire the one of him and John F. Kennedy on the wall, a token of his involvement in the Civil Rights Movement in Mississippi. A retired journalist and Harley Davidson enthusiast, I used to revel in his use of profanity, used to soak up his rants about the "lying motherfuckers" at the Clarion Ledger, or just rednecks in general. I have never cried harder than I did as I sat in that old Universalist church during his funeral. His wife reminisced with me some after that, reminding me of the day George ran out of gas on his Harley and I stopped, as I often did for stranded motorists on my road, to help. She said, "George said you've always been a pretty girl, but you were never more beautiful than you were that day," and I cried into her shoulder. I never told her how George talked about them, their love story, of how they met at East Central, the same way I met my husband. I never told her how candidly he talked to me about their sex life, about how he used to worry that she wasn't really sexually attracted to him but yet stayed with him because they were just "so damned compatible!"

I never told anyone much about George, but as we passed by his house I knew this was the perfect place, the exact place I wanted to leave my mark on Louisville. I told Jeremy to pull over and there at 4 am with George's old house as my backdrop, I left something I hope will inspire at least one kid from Betheden. It was my gift to Jeremy, to our marriage, to George, to Todd, to Amanda, to every other kid who hates their hometown or who desperately wants to start fresh and be forgiven. Sins washed clean! I give you the stop sign in front of George's house, the one connecting my road to Amanda's:

As I drove away from Louisville yesterday, for the first time in my LIFE, I got teary-eyed. I thought of George, too, and what it was that I always loved about him. It was his raw honesty I think. No matter who he was around, George would look like a little wrinkled old man but he'd open his mouth and say, "Goddamnit, this is boring." I just loved it. And I thought, "If only everyone could be that honest, that real," and immediately, like it was the voice of God herself, Gandhi's words popped into my head: You have to be the change you wish to see in the world.

I hope this blog is a good start to me being that change.

Thanks for reading all of it.

Last Thursday I gave my presentation to the entire group on the SharePoint. Overall I think it went very well. I stepped through the design (using SameTime's screen sharing for those who are in different locations) and explained what I had done and what my goal was in the redesign. I had to try and explain how the information that I was presenting, mostly pertaining to my specific team, could be customized for the other teams. I feel that I did fairly well in this. Everyone seemed to understand where I was coming from and what I was doing.

The biggest question that came up was maintenance. My internship is suppose to end August 15th, and after I am gone who is suppose to maintain my work? I honestly hadn't even thought about this question. Everything I have done is using the base out-of-the-box functionality of SharePoint and I explained that it should require very little maintenance. All it would require to work is for people to keep the information up to date. As long as the information was up to date SharePoint would take care of all the filtering and sorting that I was doing.

I created a small little survey, in SharePoint of course, to try and better gauge the response of the group to the redesign. I gave them until this Friday to talk about it amongst the teams and get back to me through the survey, email, or whatever. So far I have gotten a few responses back and they are mostly positive.

I also did a quick version of my presentation for several people who were not able to make it last week today. That also went well though I think trying to condense my presentation made me a little hasty and tongue tied.

♀?♂  Men see friendship differently. Women don’t fit a man’s mold of pure friendship, except when they are not sex targets.

♀?♂  Men treat women according to what they appear to be—sex object, slut, lady, sloppy, neat, pretty, immaculately groomed, careless, desperate, disposable.... That is, she’s responsible for the respect with which she’s treated.

♀?♂  Men treated as sex targets by females learn that all women have little else to offer. Let the fun and irresponsible games continue. Visible groupies are more significant than unseen bed post notches.

♀?♂  Modern female fidelity is questionable to men, because so many women sacrifice themselves at the altar of sexual freedom.

♀?♂  More than sex, men crave appreciation for who they are and what they do. If not their wife, however, sex works just fine for today—thank you very much.

♀?♂  One major facet of a man’s sense of significance rests upon not having to face men who have bedded his woman.

[More jack about Jack appears in posts 232, 217, 202, 185, 172, 162, 153, 142, 135, 132, 114, 97, 91, and 7. Scroll down or search by the number with a dot and space following it.]

Later that night, as my wife and I were discussing the new baby, the oldest son excused himself from bed and joined us in the living room, crying.  First, he wanted to know if it was okay to cry when we're happy.  Then, he wanted us to know that he would die, if necessary, to protect this new baby from harm ("robbers," actually).  This sense of joy and responsibilty that he felt to an unknown baby was very impressive and I remember thinking, "Kid's got character!"

I know I'm a doting Dad but that kid does have character.  And loads of it.  And everybody knows it.  And sometimes I wonder: Where does it come from?  Is it nature or is it nurture?  Can I take credit or is it part of one of God's grand designs?  Was he genetically predisposed to his character or did he learn it from me (Ha!)?  And what does it matter anyway?

I have to confess something about my nature.  It is in my predisposition to look at women lustfully.  That's right: "My name's Matt and I'm a man."  And if I wasn't a Christian, and if I wasn't worried about the consequences, and if I wasn't so (not) tall, dark and handsome, I might have had numerous sexual encounters with numerous women.  But I haven't even though it is in my nature!

Meanwhile, I was nurtured to be a one-woman-man.  My Dad was married to one woman all of her life and both of my grandpas are married to the "wives of their youth."  So my upbringing encouraged and led me to become a one-woman-man (which I am in every way).

My nurture says "one-woman-man," and my nature says "as many as possible;" and so there is a little nurture vs. nature battle that takes place inside me (and I'm neither a chauvinist nor a pervert).

Our post-modern, post-Christian society says: If it's in my nature then it must be okay because I was born that way.  (Ah, now you see where I am going with this, right?).

If I accept this hedonistic philosophy I can say: "If it's in my nature to sleep with lots of women then by golly I'll sleep with lots of women.  Consequences to my wife and kids be damned.  God's standards be damned.  I was born this way and I deserve to be happy!"  Certainly any reasonable person can see the many fallacies of such a philosophy.

So here's what I think about the whole Nature vs. Nurture debate as it pertains to who we are and our moral standards...

First: who we are is determined by four things in no particular order: (1) nature; (2) nurture; (3) the choices we make; and (4) the will of God.

Second: just because something is part of our nature doesn't mean that it's morally acceptable (in fact, most of our natural/base tendencies are morally reprehensible; see New Testament discussion on flesh/sinful nature). 

Third: neither nature nor nurture have any authority or bearing on determining what is right and wrong (the moral equivalence of natural selection is genocide).

Fourth: only a Being with creative authority over human experience has the right to determine what is right and wrong (for romance, for marriage, for society, for faith, etc.).

So the next person who tells me that what they are doing is "okay because they were born that way;" well, I'm just going to slap them because that's my natural inclination.

This post is the conclusion to a post I wrote a long time ago, appropriately titled Racism (appropriately because, at least superficially, that post makes me look very racist(!)- so I guess this post is partly to clear up any misconceptions that I have anything against black people, which I don't, and expose my true feeling regarding them, and if possible without excessive stereotyping (oops too late :P)

I actually sent an email to someone (who I initially thought was black--well technically I still don't know, but intuition tells me they're not) which perfectly captures the gist of what I'm trying to get across in this post, so I'll just indulge in my already over-used practice of copying directly from the email, with essentially no editing.

"FTR, I consider blacks unfortunate. They are violent and sexual tendencies in their genetics, but it was not always this way. Throughout history, they were targeted for thousands of years, by various nations and empires for slavery. This resulted in several generations of interbreeding, prioritizing physique, endurance, and all other qualities suited for hard labor. This resulted in handicaping the other genes, which also in turn criples African cultures, and thus countries and their descendents, beyond repair.

I feel pity for blacks. they are mankind's greatest sin, and America is paying for it right now, with the blacks ultimately suffering most, because they cannot help the way they are. Genetics is, after all, the most difficult thing to oppose, and add to that a corrupt background and culture- living successfully is nearly impossible for most.

but if anything, it proves that at least one Biblical prophesy is right :-)"

So yeah, to clarify on that: Africans were slaves long before America, or even (civilized) Europe existed. Ironically, everything seems to point to their origin as slaves as being after they (in Egypt) enslaved Hebrews.

Well, I don't know much about African history outside Egypt (should do research), and it's more than likely that they enslaved their own kind long before Abraham even encountered them, let alone Moses. But it cannot be ignored that Egypt, the country once holding the title of most advanced and largest empire in the world (for over 1000 years) ended up (indirectly) regressing into slavery after a few generations of using Hebrews for slave labor.

God said the Hebrews would never find peace again until the end of times)- and if anything that prophesy was an understatement (read:Holocaust). well, that's a bit of a detour from this post though.

As I'll introduce in my post Karma, I believe in miracles, although they IMO do not [necessarily] come from God, but are likely the universe's failsafe mechanism when the balance of things is threatened. Therefore I think that miracles must happen to Africans that will make up for their struggles (as our sin). I think they have happened, in the form of African leaders such as "Martin Luther King Jr." or George Washington Carver" or perhaps even "Akeelah" (or whatever her real name is- only know her name in the movie "Akeelah and the Bee". (lol BTW Akila is an Egyptian female name meaning "intelligent". Cool!)

Well, perhaps these might not be miracles, but Karma does find a way- that is something I am sure of. I believe that American, and perhaps other countries, are paying this debt, having enjoyed technologies, wealth, food, and luxuries that we should not, and these things were largely the product of manipulating African borns, and other minorities (our corporations are still manipulating Third-World countries- abusing their impoverished state) Now we have a crime rate that is far greater than any country, and when we consider what we have gained through war, slavery, and capitalism- it's not that surprising that our sins caught up with us while we're kicking back in high places. (you'll probably have to click on the link to get the joke- it's an irony-loaded pun) Especially ironic is the fact the Africans are the ones doing the payback- and they're not doing it on purpose (honestly what kind of happiness could people get out of that?)- but out the "ill-bred" (another pun) that Americans, and their ancestors, gave them. How appropriate is that!?!

One final point that I noticed is that our circumstances, and the Karma-oriented reasoning I'm presenting, is shockingly similar to the very premise presented in the 2000 film Unbreakable. It was directed by M. Night Shyamalan- I gotta remember that name- a lot of good movies (IMO) were directed by him. To the point:

A little history: In the movie, two twins are born, but one is fair-skinned, strong, "unbreakable" (as demonstrated in several freak-accidents) a sense of justice so strong that he can literally hear people calling for help when crimes occur. His only weakness is water, which he essentially collapses under the pressure of, perhaps eventually melting (although this never occurs in the movie, obviously). The other twin- is dark-skinned, and has bones so hollow that just walking too long, or getting bumped- will cause him to potentially break several bones. Out of a bittersweet and confused mix between fidelity and jealousy, he wrecks havoc, both to reunite with his brother, and out of the helpless belief that he is destined to be a villain, just as his serendipitous brother was destined to be a hero. I think this was a genius idea for the writer(s), as it makes for a magnificent metaphor of the permeation of sacrifice in every aspect of life, and, more controversially, the fact that Americans, like the protagonist of "Unbreakable", live in the luxury they due as the result and at the expense of the deteriation of the African race, having descended from slaves that were abused both genetically and culturally, so that we may live in the sinful luxury we do now. Of course, I do not believe in sin morally (as I said in my Evil post) but I do believe in it as the negative energy of Karma.

Since the inception of this fund, the markets have been in a clear bear market.  Let's take a look at how the fund has performed.

Although it's only been 3 months, you can see that the fund has performed outstanding.  From 4/7/08 the S&P 500 is down approximately 9.1% (as measured by SPY ETF), while FOTTX is only down 2.8%. 

We'll continue to watch this fund and post updates in the future.