For me, it's the swiss cheese scarf. The second one of two that I am making for Xmas pressies. It is mindless knitting-- you don't even need to purl! Knit a couple rows, then do the cast off row (to make the holes), knit the cast on row, knit a couple more... repeat. The cast on row is, to me, the most annoying row of any knitting project I have ever done. I'm using the cable cast on, which is easy enough; it gets sketchy on the row after when you have to tighten up the stitches.

Oh, and have I mentioned it's fine gauge knitting? Size 3 needles, folks!

Anyways... this project has gone with me to the mountains of West Virginia, to the beaches of Maryland, and has been sitting awaiting completion while I worked on a pair of socks. Yesterday's Bravo marathon of Project Runway, Million Dollar Listing and a preview of the Rachel Zoe project proved to be good background for getting this thing almost done, as well as the Bourne Supremacy (not as good as the Bourne Identity, IMHO). And still... I have at least one more skien of this Patons Grace in Azure to go (I have two more, but one might be enough for the perfect scarf).

Roxy spend a lot of the day in the corner:

Annie attempted to get up all in my business, which she likes to do when I knit. I don't have a photo of that, for obvious reasons, but here she is sitting under a lamp:

[caption id="" align="alignleft" width="250" caption="Ike & Tina going at it."][/caption]

Off the Gulf Coast - Hurricane Ike is allegedly moving in on Tina at a record pace, so I ask, "What's speed got to do with it?" Everything.

Speed is the basis of some relationships, the storms, windfall and pressure all add to that system, but sometimes things happen too fast... and in the case of Ike and Tina, sometimes for the wrong reasons.

"It looks like Ike is going to devour Tina, just use her up and spit her out." Says OSU Meteorologist Paul Westindorf.

"But so far, her big wheels keep on turnin'"

After I went on a 36 hour road trip/running away/’missing person’s report filed’ in May of 2006 – wait. Scratch that. I now remember crack was part of the reason I ran away. Before I went on my 36 hour road trip, in the vein of really bad decisions I decided to have some fun in Atlanta. Well, relieve some depression and get out of the dorms. Sex has and always will be my drug of choice. Then again, when you starve yourself, the body releases endorphins other crazy drugs already stored inside. Again, I digress. I decided to have some fun, and ended up meeting someone online. We can call him Seneschal.

It was a Sunday morning. There was nothing better to do, and I’m fairly certain it was a new moon. We went about it for awhile, then Seneschal sent me upstairs to use this hose like contraption that I’d always wanted but need a home of my own so my mother doesn’t come across yet another bit of gay paraphernalia. She’s discovered my heels, the receipt for porn, and more shockingly, the receipt for dildos and condoms. Mind you this was all hidden very well, some of it stored with my spare tire in my car. I’m convinced mothers have x-ray vision and superpowers of detection.

I come back downstairs with a clean body, inside and out, and lo and behold Seneschal is lighting up. A crack pipe. I’ve been in many “what the fuck” situations, but seeing someone I’d just been very intimate with lighting up and no forewarning was very disconcerting. He asked if I wanted a hit, and I respectfully declined but asked where I could smoke a cigarette. He also told me that the elderly were being hit especially hard by the Crack epidemic. I immediately thought of cracked out fairies screaming for some broad named Tina.

The second brush with the crack pipe, now that I think about it, was almost two years later this past spring. In a bizarre twist of fate, turning out to be someone I hooked up with right after I graduated from high school in a very ‘colorful’ motel of I-85. The period after high school was a resurgence of animalistic passions I seem to befall every spring. Anyways, let’s call him UnderWear Guy. He had a fetish for underwear, which seems normal enough. UWG was typically corporate. Works a 9-5 job for some insurance company or something. If I met him under different circumstances, I would have thought he had 2.5 kids and a wife named MaryAnn who wore pearl necklaces.

I saw UWG for a couple of weeks, until the very last visit where he apparently was so stressed out, he absolutely needed to pull out The Crack Pipe. His stressors were a big presentation at work and a deal that could’ve possibly fallen through. Plus a friend who smokes enough crack to forget where he parked his car the week before, and was coming to look for it and demanded his help.

UnderWear Guy was decent enough when we had time together; big footballer type guy who put on a hard demeanor but was a big softie underneath. Ultra materialistic, but what member of The Gays isn’t. Save for hints at his terrible temper. All of that I can ignore. I’m a big boy; I carry a small knife in my bag most places I go and especially when I meet strangers or new people. And I’m pretty skilled in the art of sedation with cords and pills. But The Crack Pipe? Do you know what people do not only for a klondike bar but The Crack Pipe?

There are just some addictions for which I cannot stand. Well, really just crack, cocaine and heroin. Cocaine’s slightly understandable. Barbituates and opiates, oddly enough, are alright in my book. They depress the system, and while the world may not make sense a drunk is only going to move so far before passing out. Stimulants, however, are an entirely different story, craft a reality that seems too real, and presents the danger of energizing the suspect to unbelievable levels. Seeing this trait of a possible Chernobyl-type temper and his affinity for Crack, I quickly deduced that were this to continue and the two situations to combine I could be in a very delicate predicament. I love flirting with danger and laughing at death (sometime with him) but when I collected the $20 for gas I didn’t look back. The $20 also bought me some chicken tenders and a pack of cigarettes. I guess cigarettes and sex are my two drugs of choice.

Signed,

Patrique

Originally Aired: 5/8/2008

The Oprah Show travels to Las Vegas for an unforgettable visit with legendary superstars Cher and Tina Turner at Caesars Palace.

Guests: Cher, Tina Turner

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=5tKQZecXGx4

Listen to it all. Moved me to tears.

First the point: Christian boys...don't bother with strippers. We know it's exciting to think about going, but honestly it's not worth it. Even if your Christian girl is not a supermodel body type, get her to strip for you. Trust us, it's way better. And Christian girls...don't be offended if your Christian boy wants to see strippers. Go with him. Even if he goes with friends. Learn what the boys are looking at. Learn what the strippers are doing. Then go home and do your own version of it. Truth. It'll be good for you, especially because while the strippers cannot touch themselves or the patrons, you can. :)

OK, so the story is not to denegrate strippers. I know some feminists oppose stripping and others accept it. I'm of mixed minds on that. Holly is a whore and loves them all.

Gordon [previously Barry in here] finally got around to telling us tonight about the strippers he went to see a few weeks ago with his cousin from Calgary. It seems in Calgary everyone goes to strippers. :)

So they go to Brandy's in town. Expensive, high class. Above a massage parlour. Lots of good dancers. Lots of bored looking dancers.

Holly and I went to the Cecil one night last summer. Same kind of show. Mostly boring. Mostly a hassle keeping the smelly old men off us and finding a way to get drinks from the not smelly young men without having to blow them in their cars.

And Holly went to see a Burlesque show earlier in the summer and built a big crush on a girl. As Holly tells it, she was short, plump like her, bigger bottom though, very breasty and a Katie Holmes bob cut. And she did her dance and strip and was mildly blushing. The whole time. And she was excited to be doing it all. Amateur exhibitionism. Quite a rush. Holly asked her if she wanted company to the after party. She said she was meeting her friends so probably not. A polite rejection we all concluded. Too bad. Holly got all hot.

So Holly thinks amateurs get into it better then pro strippers. Could be.

But Gordon. They're out at this swanky place and they're watching stags and [odd] stagettes flow through the place but all the while, there's a group of a half dozen girls sitting on the rail in the front row. Half of them are bi/les as they're into mild necking sessions here and there. And some of them are into putting a 5 or a 10 in their teeth and getting to rub their faces into the strippers boobs to pass on the cash. I didn't think that was allowed. I doubted Gordon. He swears it was true.

Anyway, Gordon and his cousin were at times more interested in watching these young girls and the young boys trying to get into their pants, than watching the more dull bored strippers. And as he tells it...

But then something miraculous happened. One of the girls at the railing starts necking with a boy who seemed to have been hanging around them all night. The she kneels on his chair straddling him. Still kissing.

Then she's back standing on the floor leaning her bum against the rail. And the fellow bends over, lifts her dress and starts licking her pussy. Clearly pushing her panties around and just sucking her off. And the girlfriends get all antsy at this, watching it all. As is everyone else in the place. Then they all get their coats and leave.

And as Gordon says, it was the climax of the evening. Few dancers after that little show could hold anyone's attention in the same way. Eventually he left and came over to my place for some 1am cuddles.

The moral of the story: amateur exhibitionism is far more effective than professionals. Who seem to be banned by law from doing anything too risque anyways!

Beyonce and Tina aka Mama Knowles hit up The Early Show to support Solange and the release of her album. Peep the video above to check out their interview and Solo's.

Solo also performed "I've Decided. I love that top she has on *searches for it*.

I gravitated towards the enticing scent of hotdogs at the cavernous entrance, swimming against a tide of children who were rushing to catch the next stage show at the far end of the hall. I didn't mind, as long as I had escaped before the music started.

I collected my hotdog, overfilled with onions and mustard. Perfect. I ate like I hadn't had a meal in years, even though it was only two hours since my last trip to the deli just outside my hotel, then cursed to myself as a dollop of mustard landed on the only part of my bag that was fabric. I quickly finished the 'dog then wiped the yellow blob, but it already appeared to have stained.

Looking up from my petty misfortune I noticed a familiar, yet ragged face staring at me. The gentleman in a yellow shirt was dragging with him as many stuffed animals as he could humanly carry, and coming straight towards me.

Our eyes were locked. I knew this man, but from where? I raced through long forgotten names.

"David!" I blurted out, startling myself by the level of nervous energy I was expelling.

"Tina?" He asked cooly.

We continued staring at each other for what seemed like forever.

"No..." I finally replied, slightly puzzled.

"Heh, I'm not David. You look so familiar though."

"Yeah, you too."

There was an awkward silence for a few moments before I let out a stifled giggle.

"There's no way you could be David anyway."

"Oh? And why's that?" He asked, looking bemused.

"The wedding band. David didn't swing that way." I toyed with my own matrimonial ring and saw the man smirk.

"That's funny," he said. "Tina was gay as well."

This is a Thank You note.

A few years ago; we were led to begin to minister the Gospel in forms of faith, wisdom, healing, salvation, prayer, spiritual warfare and more recently the Blood of Jesus to the world via the Internet. We expected God to back it and He did far above what we could ever ask or think.

All of the sites have been well received and prayer requests come by the hundreds. We just want you to know that we pray for everyone who comes here, has been here and people who will come here. Every prayer request is taken seriously and is prayed for as soon as it is received!

Many of you have encouraged us and prayer for us and wished us well. We fully intend to reach an incredible milestone by year's end celebrating Jesus!

*Thank You Lord for Loving us so much and ordering our steps! Thank You Holy Spirit for leading us! Thank You Jesus for redeeming us!

* Thank you to my church, my Spiritual parents, the many ministers in the Gospel who have taight me and helped me grow and thank you to all of my Spiritual mentors.

* Thank you to my email network (I have the best email network !) that has been pared down to about 200 people! You never once rejected any correspondence; instead you've been loving and supportive...inspiring me to continue.

* A special thanks to my Online Prayer Posse: Sharon, Yeap Chee Seng, Tyson & Marta Odums, Sondan Lyles, Joana Bibbs, Belinda, Bisi Odapopulo , Min. Charlesetta Hawkins and others Online!

* A very special thank you to Gene McGuire.  He has written almost a complete Blog at the Wisdom Cafe.    Gene literally is the person who got me to writing to others after I received one of his letters that he's been mailing out to family and friends for twenty-five years or more.  That's faithfulness.  He is encouraging and supportive (as are all of my Online friends).  He understands the work involved in committing to writing online. Though we're separated by many miles I'm proud to call him one of my mentors and my friend.

* A special thanks also to the Disciples On Assignment- my Early Morning Prayer Friends who inspire so many writings and prayers: (alphabetical order) Carla, Carolyn, Esther, Jackie, Joann, Judy, Kathleen, Michelle, Patricia, Quame, Reese, Rose, Selena, Serena, Tera, Tina...also all of the prayer warriors in our network including: Merrell Cheeks, Lisa, Brother Andrew Valle, Janet Dorsey, Barbara, Carmella, Tanya & Matthew, Margaret, Yvonne White and Robin Anderson...our prayer friends ...we'll be adding more names

* A special thanks to family members for all of their good support!

THERE WOULD BE NO SITE WITHOUT THE PEOPLE WHO COME. WHETHER YOU KNOW US OR NOT...WE THANK YOU FOR COMING!

WHO WILL GOD SEND TODAY? WE CAN HARDLY WAIT!

_________________________________________________________________________________________________

FYI- Did you know that Technorati reports 172 million Blogs on the Internet? That supposedly does not include 72 million Blogs from China! WOW! With all of that competition...we're Blessed! We're expecting a lot more traffic and that's a fact!

The yarn I used: Malabrigo kettle dyed pure merino wool. Did I say that already?

Overall, I'm pleased. It was my first time out, and the yarn is a decidedly different color than the original. When I do this again, I don't know if I'm going to use this yarn, though it is gorgeous yarn (for those keeping score). It kept it's softness, which I was worried about, and didn't felt.

It's going to be a scarf for my mom. The plan is to alternate skeins so that it has texture rather than some crazy look like it's two shades of bunk yarn.