I was given this blog award by Wipneus , Reisiger and also by Eilandkind which I really appreciate as blogger friends. I've thought to spoil you all with two pictures from the Lake District. This fell/mountain on the top pic is called..and I hope I'm right..."Mellbreak". I do apologise...when I followed my notes I've made, I realised that fell is called Carling Knott and it's the very same Carling Knott that we climbed the day before our return...the only complete day without rain! during our stay. It's about 320 m - comparing to Mount Aux Sources in South Africa (in the Drakensberg mountains) which I climbed when I was 15 and which is about 4300m!  It's very close to Mockerkin where we stayed and from where I took the picture,  it's about 1/4 mile to Loweswater, the quietest Lake of all the lakes in the Lake District. You can see part of Loweswater on the picture! 

You can't beat the feeling that you get (as a welshman) when you see those two rising towers of the (second) Severn Crossing when you have been away for more than, ooh I dunno, say an hour...

The only downside is that you then have to rifle through your pockets for the loose change (will they ever just have it as a round bloody figure?) and that the Celtic Manor (resort) is only a few bends in the motorway away...groan...what an uninspiring sight, especially as a Welsh architect(uraldesigner).

Anyway, yes, I am home safe and sound and (fairly) happy.

It is late now though so won't write much other than to say that tomorrow I have an interview with another architectural firm and that my writing targets (for Dark Star) have been based around a 1st September start, and that is tomorrow...

So I guess tomorrow will see the launch of the first details regarding Dark Star...I bet you can't wait can you? *yawn* LOL

The situation: Walking may seem like just an archaic form of transportation to some, but we here at the JSA know that walking is also a way to strut one’s style. What we mean is that the way one walks is an indication of their true self, the beast within (eat that, Freud). For example, men who walk with an exaggerated arm swing and an overly large step are likely those with issues concerning their southern regions. Think of the walking equivalent of a dude with a hummer…with spinning rims …pumping out some C+C music factory. Or, take those people who don’t walk, rather they glide. Each step seems to be as if they stepped on a bed of marshmallows with a level of grace only equaled by the fancy footwork of Tom Jones. This walk indicates that this person must be involved in the black arts because it is unusual to be as graceful as Tom Jones. Perhaps the most devious and awkward of all walking types is the slow walker. These people, demonstrating their callous character, walk at their own pace with no respect for the appropriately speeded walker behind them. They are likely the same kind of people who eat someone’s jellybeans and leaves only the black ones. One of the most awkward and irritating situations that can occur on a street is getting stuck behind a slow walker. There is evidence that such a situation can actually release anger steam from one’s ears (you know what we are talking about).

So, what do you do when you are stuck behind a slow walker?

The solution:
First, you may say “Oh JSA, are you a bunch of senile old hags? You wrote about this in situation #20, the sidewalk shuffle” To you, we respond, Nay. Slow walkers cannot be handled as street dancers/shufflers. Street dancers are just confused souls. These two are different breeds and must be treated accordingly.

Now, to get around those heartless slow walkers, there are both general and specific solutions. The following solutions may seem cruel hearted, but we are dealing with a malicious population here. The punishment must fit the crime.

For a specific solution, suss out the slower walker. Let’s say the slow walker is a club-goin’, Jay-Z listenin’ dude wearing those weird Kanye West Venetian blind glasses. From behind, pretend to talk on your phone (the ever-awkward-saving tool) and loudly exclaim “Serious! There is a sale on gold necklaces with really big dollar sign emblems? Man, I just past that store a block back!” This will result in your slow walker doing the turnaround and booking it to the location of your mentioned “sale” and, thus, getting out of your way. Tailor this approach for specific slow walkers by deleting ‘gold necklaces with really big dollar sign emblems’ and insert whatever hot commodity fits said slow walker.

A more general approach would be to just yell fire. That’ll get ‘em moving.

You know, playing Tom Jones classics at four thirty in the afternoon is just plain wrong, even by Vegas standards. There's something inherently sad about it. Gin-soaked cat ladies with mustaches who never got a husband and old, leathery, crinkled guys lamenting the good old days where you could get a horse, a steak and some punani for a hundred bucks and still have change left over for a fifth of Jack Daniels.

This was a party however, but it's still wrong if you ask me. It's like drinking daiquiris from a highball glass, you just can't do it without cringing at the magnitude of wrong that suggests.

It all went ok though, despite that fuckin', deadbeat Pedro letting me down last minute with a hangover sent from el Diablo himself. He broke up with his dancing chica and was self medicating his way back to normality. I had to recruit my old buddy Perry DiSopo on bass and occasional guitar, since it was a full band effect this show needed and he's a full-on kinda guy.

Perry and I have jammed a number of times over the years and despite his being somewhat advanced in age he can still shake it with the best of 'em, so it wasn't as uncomfortable a job as you might expect. Think a shriveled, more orange Tony Bennett with Parkinson's and high on amphetamines and you'll have a decent idea of what that entails. Happily his legendary hip didn't give out - last time he did a guest stint he swiveled it a little too far. People were hugely impressed till they realized the dude had dislocated the fucker and his sexy 'come hither baby' look was actually saying 'holy shit I'm dying get a fucking paramedic you c**ts!'

Also the guy's not at all pleasant to look at and I'm sure he wouldn't mind me saying so. The years (and the liquor) haven't been all that kind. He kinda looks like someone superimposed an elephant's ass on his cheekbones. More contours than a map of New Mexico. Cool guy though. Straight up fella. His blood is 100% gin at this point in time, the crazy old fucker.

The lady having the birthday was delighted. She drank, clapped and jiggled around like a 14 year old Latina at a Menudo concert, only in a much less aesthetically pleasing fashion. There are parts that really should not wobble that just took on a life of their own. But the old gal had a damn good day and I think my version of "It's Not Unusual" sung with her sitting on my lap, made her whole fuckin' week. Wish I could say the same for my leg, I feel like I've been kneecapped by Al Capone. Plus the chick kept licking my neck, what the dilly is that all about, y'all? That ain't kosher.

Still, a couple C notes isn't too bad for a little leg discomfort and a soggy neck, know what I mean compadres? Rock out.

Welcome to Part 3 of International Tom Jones Week, the one week of the year when the wobbly Welsh warbler receives his proper due as the Greatest Singer Of The 20th Century And Beyond.

The Great Man is, of course, a Master of all forms of music and, in addition to his many other titles, is also the "King Of Rock'n'Roll".

Elvis Presley - fat balladeer
Jerry Lee Lewis - mad speedofile, and
Little Richard - mad transvestite,

only Thomas the Jones is the true "King Of Rock'n'Roll".

feel the power as he exudes his manliness at former jailbait Brooke Shields, requesting that she be his "Little Queenie".

Now listen to well known toileteer Mister Chuck Berry as he labours away in the knowledge that he will never be as good as Thomas the Jones

Watch the Chuckster in action below;

_____________________________________________________

The Mr H Glee Club is off on tour

Yup, it's that time of year, with pa-ternity tests pending, that the Mr H Glee Club heads off to take their country rockin' sounds to the internet free / mobile dead zones of our beloved United States of America.

Local law enforcement permitting, we should be back around about the beginning of September, but don't panic - the Mr H Trailer Park and 24/7, 365, All-Nite Pig Grill (closed Wednesdays) will be in the safe hands of Lil' Lindy-Lou. Well, hand, ever since the mincer incident. So stop on by for all your dead meat needs (we rent trailers by the hour).

If you happy to be over here, looking for pleasure, me and the boys will be appearing in Bald Knob, Arkansas, Blue Ball, Delaware, French Lick, Indiana, Gay Head, Massachusetts, Square Butt, Montana, Humptulips, Washington, Pussy Creek, Ohio and Toadsuck Arkansas.

If you can't make it here's a rare, live recording of the Mr H Glee Club to keep you warm at night.

We now understand why our mothers and grandmothers made such a fuss about him.

At risk of besmirching Mr. Jones's good name, we include Carlton's rendition for good measure.

Whaddya think? I can picture him.

Welcome to Part 2 of International Tom Jones Week, the one week of the year when the wobbly Welsh warbler receives his proper due as the Greatest Singer Of The 20th Century And Beyond.

The Great Man is, of course, a Master of all forms of music, so even though many have laid claim to the title "Kings Of Boogie" including;
Savoy Brown (who recorded a song stating so),
the Great British Status Quo, and
the Mighty Foghat,
only Thomas the Jones is the true King Of Boogie.

Here he is in the company of the divine Rita Coolidge ripping up "Something 'Bout You Baby I Like".

Now, point, scoff and mock at the Great British Status Quo, as they show themselves for the tepid and torpid labourers got lucky the are, as they attempt the same song! Hah!

Watch the Great British Status Quo in action below;

But I seriously am down with my back.  Not an unusual thing for me, because my back was absent the day muscle tone was handed out. Annoyingly, though, it has become entirely too common of late, and I would have already cashed in on the warranty on the stupid thing, if it hadn't run out last Tuesday, along with the one on my bum knee.  Wouldn't ya know?

Anyway, I'm coddling and babying it like Gwen does Kingston (yes, she named her child after the capital of Jamaica, but Jamaica's sister city is Kalamazoo, so I'm thinking the kid got off lucky!) because it is only nine days until my jaunt with Uber to Vegas, and I want that thing in tip-top shape before I see Tom and Wayne.  How uncool is it to be jumping up and down trying to get your underwear off to throw on stage, and all the time you are holding your back??!!  In the case of the demographic of those who still go to see Tom and Wayne, I guess it might not be all that unusual, though.

As those of you who have read this blog for any length of time know, when I am down and out, I tend to get drawn in by new online "hobbies."  Remember my jaunt into MySpace during a chest crud episode?? Or last month's bout with intestinal flu, when I ended up outing myself to the blogosphere at large??  Well, this time, I have been learning how to become a hack...well, not the illegal kind (which of course would make a much more interesting post, but might jeopardize my chance to throw undies at Tom and Wayne) but the social networking kind...as in "Homeschool Hacks."

This is SO my new favorite website at the moment, because it is where all the cool weird homeschoolers like myself are hangin'.  And yes, it is a social networking site, so you have all the  Facebook/MySpace features like adding friends.  Goodness knows, we homeschoolers need SOME way to feel like we have a posse of likeminded fringers.  So far, I've met some incredible homeschool hackers (also called homeschooling hotties - - did I mention I love this site??)

• There is Tina at Send Chocolate, who is homeschooling two kids with high functioning autism, a teenager, and a couple of schizophrenic cats
• Anissa, from down in Louisiana (that's just fun to say).  You can grab her cute little bee butt over at Home Where They Belong ...oh, and turn up your volume cause she's got a killer playlist
• Can't forget Michelle who I would be friends with just because of her Avatar pic!  This libertarian from California is bloggin over at Pumpkinshellz Patch
• Beautiful Karla is Looking Towards Heaven (and in my opinion, heaven is looking toward her as well, OH that gorgeous face!)  This is one fun blog that I am thrilled to have added to my roll!
• And of course, I couldn't forget Christine, who I have bragged on here about before...that lady could blog about cabbage and I would read it and beg for more!  Go visit her immediately at Welcome to My Brain! That's an order!

And these are only a FEW of the over 100 homeschooling hotties meetin', greetin', and sweetin' on each other over at Homeschool Hackers.  If you wanne be in my posse, you gotta be a hacker, man.  Me and my bad back will see you there!!

Not enough people celebrate International Tom Jones Week, the one week of the year when the wobbly Welsh warbler receives his proper due as the Greatest Singer Of The 20th Century And Beyond. But we here at GHMI feel it only fit and proper to acknowledge his genius.

Not many folks can take an ordinary song, and with the help of a special guest, some glitz, glamour and an oompah band, make it something so extraordinary. Well, TJ is that man.

To begin International Tom Jones Week, we look no further than that other legend, Sir Donny Osmond for the glitz and glamour. Marvel at how they take a piece of pap like 'Boy From New York City', and turn it into a glistening jewel, replete with neat name change to ensure the homosexualists steer clear.

Something The Manhattan Transfer should have thought about before foisting their inferior version upon us.

Come back soon, when Thomas the Jones shows the namby pamby boogieteers, Status Quo, just how to rock.

Watch The Manhattan Transfer in action below;

Or watch them here individually below (it's just a random order)

Rolling Stones, performing Satisfaction in 1966 on Ed Sullivan

Dusty Springfield, performing But Bacharach's "The Look of Love" in 1967

Donovan, performing his "Catch the Wind" in 1964

Little Stevie Wonder, performing Fingertips

James Brown, performing It's a Man's World

Johnny Cash, performing A Boy Named Sue

Ritchie Havens, performing Freedom at Woodstock in 1969

Joni Mitchell, performing her 60's hit Both Sides Now in 1970

Mamas & the Papas, performing California Dreamin' at Monterey Pop Festival in 1967

Howlin' Wolf, performing How Many More Years on Shindig (at the insistence of the Stones) in 1965

Bob Dylan, performing Just Like a Woman

Booker T & the MGs, performing Green Onions

Animals, performing Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell Ty  performing Ain't No Mountain High Enough

Aretha Franklin, performing Natural Woman in 1967

Crosby, Stills & Nash, performing Marrakesh Express in 1969 at Woodstock

Santana, performing soul Sacrifice in 1969 at Woodstock

Paul Butterfield, performing Driftin' Blues in 1969 at Woodstock (with David Sandborn)

Dionne Warwick, performing But Bacharach's Walk on By

Righteous Brothers, performing You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin' in 1964

Jimi Hendrix, performing Purple Haze at the Monterey Pop Festival in 1967

Beatles, performing I Saw Her Standing There in 1965 in Washington, DC

Cream, performing Crossraods 1968

Elvis, Lawdy Miss Claudie

Tom Jones, It's Not Unusual

Spenser Davis Group, Gimme Some Lovin'

Johnny Winter, performing Mean Town Blues at Woodstock 1969

Beach Boys, In My Room

Beatles, performing All You Need is Love on the world's first global sat broadcast in 1967

Tina Turner is a Hot Leg Goddess!

Welsh firecracker Duffy performed at the 2008 Virgin Mobile Festival in Baltimore, Maryland yesterday. She has been working hard to promote her first album entitled, "Warwick Avenue." She is garnering the right kind of attention, her fellow Welshman Tom Jones wants to duet with her!

Tom is quoted as saying: "That's because she's Welsh and she can sing, not just because she's Welsh. I'd like to do something with her."

Dare I appear as tragically unhip to my intern? I eventually answered his question by saying that I like pop and Top 40. He then asked me what it was about the music that I liked, and I said that I like the fact that I get introduced to such a variety of music. It's not just one thing like all country or R&B. It's a mix of everything. Then I asked him what he liked. And he said, "You probably won't believe me when I say this, but metal.... Really heavy metal.... Death metal." I asked him what that meant exactly and he explained it to me.

Then he asked me who my favorite artist was. Again, I wasn't sure about the possible scorn I would receive, so I meekly said, "At the moment, John Mayer." He said, "I like him! He's an awesome guitarist." I gushed with happiness, thrilled that even someone with very different tastes from my own could still appreciate them. From that point on, we were no longer boss and intern, we were friends.

I admit that to this day I still struggle with defending my musical taste because there are still mean people out there that pass judgment upon me, and I still feel the need to preface the music I talk about with, "I know this is lame, silly, goofy...." But I know I'm not alone out there because I read blogs all the time that use such wording and bloggers call certain artists their "guilty pleasures."

It's time, fellow prefacing bloggers, to be who we are. I've decided that today's post will be my first step to embracing what I enjoy musically. I will not feel bad about or defend what I say.

• John Mayer is my favorite, and I like Your Body is a Wonderland.
• I'm going to see the American Idols in concert later this month. David Cook rocks my socks!
• I have seen Clay Aiken in concert and it was a really good time.
• I saw New Kids on the Block in concert when I was in high school and wish I could see them on their current tour.
• I wish I could have seen NSYNC in concert at some point.
• I want to go to Las Vegas and see Barry Manilow or Tom Jones perform.
• One song that always makes me happy is Jive Talkin' by the Bee Gees.
• Another one is You Never Even Called Me by My Name by David Allan Coe and I sing it at the top of my lungs when I play it on my iPod.
• I love singing to Lynyrd Skynyrd songs

.

Well, that was refreshing! I feel good now. :)

In case you didn't know, I have a bit of an obsession with Tom Jones. No, not the classic novel by Henry Fielding. The crooner. The one women throw their panties to whenever he sings. There's no better way to describe his music than with the words "trance" or "candy" ... its some of the most blissfully poppy music you'll ever hear.

Anyway, my mother referred to a his song "Help Yourself (To My Lips)" today, but she got the name wrong. She changed it to "Suck Down My Lips." Perhaps you had to be there, but it cracked me up for about 20 minutes.

But just in case that didn't tickle you, this video of Tom singing that very song on his 60s TV show will. He's got to be the most self-absordbed, consciously sexy male singer to ever live. Just look at the screen in the background during the chorus. My favorite part is the random closeup at 2:29.